Safe Coconut Macaroons

I modified a recipe found on the Celiac website to substitute agave nectar for sugar. Trial and error baking:

First batch burned on the bottom, so I made the second batch smaller (1/2-inch instead of 1-inch balls) and moved the tray higher in the oven.

First batch wasn't quite sweet enough - they'll be split and smeared with unsweetened berry jam procured at Pike Place yesterday and creamed honey - so I pressed in the tops of the second batch and put a drop of honey in the middle of each little ball. Much better.

Safe Moroccan Chicken Tagine

I bought a marvelous tagine in Marrakesh, from Mohammed Fish n' Chips, a toothless fiery pusher-of-all-things, 3+ years ago. It's served as all kinds of things since then (holder of earrings, kitchen secrets, and most recently a 45 Sculpture), but not once per its dedicated purpose. It was a chilly wet day here in Seattle, so I decided it was time to test its abilities. Proof positive: it's not a decorative souvenir - it's an efficient and elegant cooking vessel.

I based my ingredients solely on what was around, so it became another purple meal. I imagine I'll try hundreds of variations on this theme now that I know how quick and satisfying tagines can be.

1 chicken breast
turmeric
cumin
cinammon
salt
pepper
yellow carrots
carrots
1 baked purple potato
1/2 shallot, sliced
dates
olive oil
honey

Heat oven to 375. Cut chicken into cubes and roll in spices - I just sprinkled each liberally straight into a bowl, shook it around, and coated the chicken. Brown on one side, uncovered in the oven. Turn over, cover in water, add vegetables (save for the potato), cover, and bake for about 30 minutes. Remove lid, add sliced baked potato and some honey, and cook uncovered for another 10 minutes. Stir and serve.

Thanks to the Itinerant Eater for reminding me to eat by my wanderlust.

Celebratory cheating, take 1

It was a birthday party. At a magnificent Italian restaurant (Via Tribunali, in Capitol Hill). And I made it through the meal itself without a single unsafe bite. I ate lovely olives, a green salad with sliced olives and shaved ham, lightly dressed, and prosciutto e melone (a personal favorite; and yes, there HAD to be garlic in the olives' past...and maybe balsamic vinegar, derived from illegal grapes, in the light dressing). And treated myself to a weak scotch and soda to salute the birthday boy (man - 30). All was well and joyful.

His mother made a cake.

Could you imagine a more appropriate first mistress? A layer of chocolate cake with buttercream chocolate frosting. A layer, formed using a Dora the Explorer cake tin, of fluffy yellow cake. Wall-eyes and an excellent air of death. The waitress brought out an enormous kitchen machete.

When it was my turn to slice into the skull, an evil laugh rose up from my belly (MWAh-ha-ha-ha-haaaa) and I knew I'd be choosing not only to touch that cake to my tongue, but to dig in, eat a slice, enjoy both layers, and do so knowing cheating with those particular intentions (joy, friendship, death-awareness, guttural comic desire) couldn't possibly be of harm.

Spiritual Soda

Cutting sugar means cutting soda. All soda. Even the elegant brands (Dry, Fentimans, etc.) have cane sugar, so it's time for me to invent a substitute.

Blending this need with the witchcraft that's been making so much sense of late, I came up with the following initial foray into spiritual soda bottling. I've now passed some off as a perfect 30th birthday gift and watched them achieve their intended effects. (I also had a lovely day tweaking the combinations - taste tests over the relative grace of one glass over another with perfect Seattle rain accompaniment.)

Grace
lavender
chamomile
rose congou
fresh seltzer

Power
dragon weed
mutah white
honey
fresh seltzer

Peace
scullcap
chamomile
honey
fresh seltzer

Dragon Killer
yerba mate
dragon weed
rose congou
agave nectar
fresh seltzer

I make distilled teas of each herb, adding honey/agave to the earthiest while hot, then chill the jars and mix and match the potions, using about 1 part potion to 4 parts seltzer from my amazing seltzer machine. Mason jars hold the carbonation surprisingly well.

For the birthday gift incarnation, I also threw in a little jar of my perfect chocolate pudding as a potion for pleasure.

Safe Purple pork and potatoes

A lovely square meal made for 1 to close a long hard week.

1 pork chop
1/2 shallot
splash of olive oil
1 purple potato (set to baking as soon as I got home, allowing it a good hour plus of hot oven time)
1 broccoli stalk

I always feel best when my plate has sections for the elements - meat, vegetable, starch - and this diet has really enhanced that love. Had a lovely chat at work with a couple men who cook about sauce, and shallots came up. What a perfect garlic replacement! Sautee the shallots in oil until they're translucent. Sear the pork chop in their pan. Remove pork once seared and transfer to the hot oven for 10 minutes or so to cook through. The potato will be well baked by the time you throw the pork in the oven. Take this opportunity to remove its tin foil and get its elegant purple skin crisped. Steam the broccoli. Drizzle on some expensive extra virgin olive oil (I bought Merula, from Spain, primarily for the elegant raven on its tin can), salt, pepper. Burst open the potato and give it the same treatment. Stir your oil-shallot "sauce" and pour over pork. Revel in the purple of it all.

Recommended context: cook with Grizzly Bear's Friend EP spinning on the turntable, a fat joint at the ready, a Peace spiritual soda on the counter (see soda recipe), and plans for a fire on the beach to honor a full and glorious moon.

PERFECT Safe Chocolate Pudding

1 can coconut milk
1/3 cup tapioca (I bought organic gluten-free)
1/2 cup agave nectar
1/8 cup cocoa powder (E. Guittard unsweetened rare red dutch processed cocoa powder for baking nad hot chocolate - thanks, Guittardo)

Stir coconut milk and tapioca in a saucepan. Simmer and whisk consistently for 12 minutes. Take off heat and whisk in the agave and cocoa powder. Refrigerator to room temperature. Stir and serve. Utterly delicious. Sugar-free, gluten-free, dairy-free. Impressive.




So good I made a second batch before washing the supplies...

Early September Lost Diet blues

It's been a tough week. Grumpy from gut aches, frequent bathroom visits, and constant work stress, I've had a very hard time rising up to the positive place I need to be in to survive this diet. A few hours of yoga (Ki, my magnificent teacher, is back from her summer hiatus), a couple sunsets, a fantastic rock show (The Woods), and some power mustering later, I'm floating through the end of a long work week into a long workless weekend. And so the blogging continues, and the righteousness returns.

Today's simple realizations:

1. Calbee Snapea Crisps are my new favorite "junk" food. (Baked. Salted. Puffed pea pods. $1 on sale at my Emerald Smoothie joint.)

2. The ladies at Tenoche, my favorite Mexican spot near work, are beautiful. (Grilled fish with white rice, black beans, and sliced avocado for lunch.)

3. The diet I've been doing so far is officially the Lost Diet: all fruit and coconut. No frigging wonder I've got traveler's diahrrea. At least I don't have fellow humans out to get me...or wait, isn't that what coworkers are for? Time for savory and highly civilized additions.

4. The most civilized addition of all? Sauces! This weekend will be focused on mastering sauces I can prepare, digest, use to spice up meat and rice, and store for easy meal prep on worn-out weeknights.

Thanks to all the beautiful people who love me enough to see that my grumpiness is all about physiology.